Why do so many think, it's not for me?

I talk to people about their potential and ask, "Can you see it for yourself? Can you imagine that?"

The response is often negative: "No, I can't. Maybe it's for you or them. But not for me."

"Why?" I ask.

And these are the answers I get too frequently: "Because I'm not good looking enough or talented enough". "I'm too old, too fat, too slow", or too "something" that's a negative characteristic.

I think of a very capable young man who regularly delivers express packages to our office. He's depressed because he is sure he could do more with his life, but he is equally sure it just won't happen. He knows he'll always be driving that delivery truck. He has listened to many of my motivational tapes. They get him "up" for a while, but he slips back into his same rut of depression.

I see this all the time. I've had similar conversations with my children. They've told me they would like to do or be a certain tiling, and I would say, "Are you doing it now anywhere? Do you try to do it on Saturdays? Are you doing it in your spare time up in your room? Are you writing about it? Are you talking to your friends about it? Are you obsessed with it?"

There is a problem. People – young and old – are not willing to investigate, invest, and persist. They want instant success, and they want it now. Among the many letters I have received asking for a key to success, I will never forget one on the two-part form that gave me the writer's message and left a section for "please reply below."

Dear Dr. Waitley: Please tell me everything I need to know, to become a top speaker, to record tapes, write books, and make a fortune. I'm in a hurry, so please use the bottom of this form for your answer and that will enable you to get it off to me right away. I need your answer immediately.

I filled up the bottom of the form with "WORK, WORK,

WORK, WORK, WORK, WORK" until there was no more room to write.

Five Action Steps to a Better Self-image

1. Set your own internal standards instead of comparing yourself to others. Accept yourself as you are right now, but keep upgrading your standards, lifestyle, behavior, professional training, and relationships by associating with winners.

2. Project your best self. Dressing well and looking your best do not have to involve trendy fashions and designer labels. Being appropriate for the occasion and being neat and clean are more important. Personal grooming and appearance provide an instantaneous projection on the surface of how you feel inside about yourself.

3. Read a being-the-best biography each month. Look for life stories of those who have reached the top in your profession or in your major hobby or of someone you admire. As you read, imagine yourself as the person you are reading about.

4. Take stock this weekend of the images with which you display yourself. Since the self-image comprises the visual, conceptual display of the self-esteem (clothes, auto, home, garage, closets, dresser drawers, desk, photos, lawn, garden), make a priority list to get rid of all the clutter and sharpen up the expressions of your life.

5. Go for a private walk near the water, in the country, near the mountains, or to a park, and recall your childhood play and fantasies. What did you really love to do as a child? What were you good at? Which classes did you enjoy the most throughout your school years? If it weren't for time, money, or circumstance, what would you be doing with most of your days and nights? Dust off and reactivate your creativity.

Comprehension Check

1. Find English equivalents of the following:

я некрасивый, у меня нет таланта;

я слишком старая, толстая, медлительная;

или что-нибудь еще «слишком»;

получше распорядиться своей жизнью;

этому не суждено случиться;

это его стимулирует ненадолго;

образ жизни, отмеченный унынием и неверием в свои силы;

они хотели бы чем-то заниматься или кем-то стать;

стало ли это вашей навязчивой идеей.

2. Find in the text the sentences that say:

...the form that had two sections: one with the letter as such (per se) and the other intended for the addressee's reply;

Please tell me everything necessary to know to become an important and successful motivational speaker who earns a lot of money.

...that will enable you to send your reply immediately (ASAP — as soon as possible);

3. Explain in your own words the meaning of the following sentences:

...He is sure he could do more with his life, but he is equally sure it just won't happen.

They get him up for a while but he slips back into his same rut of depression.

People — young and old — are not willing to investigate, invest and persist.

Discussion

1. Denis Waitley has a rich experience of dealing with people who think of themselves in negative terms. Why does he believe it's bad?

2. In what does Denis Waitley see the key to success?

3. Take the questions Denis Waitley asks his children for them to test if they are ready to work, and turn them into the instructions for those who strive to achieve success.