BRIDGET. Sound of knocking on door
No, it’s all right.
Sound of knocking on door
BRIDGET
Hector …
ANNIE
Hector …
BRIDGET
I’ve got something for you.
HECTOR
Oh, OK.
Come in.
BRIDGET
Spoil sport!
NICK
Hector!
Hector!
HECTOR
Hello.
NICK
Here are your clothes, you will look so cool.
HECTOR
Cool?
NICK
Co-ol.
HECTOR
Cool!
NICK
Nice melons!
BRIDGET
Melons?
Who are those from?
ANNIE
Ah, I think Hector has been shopping online.
Oh, I’m really thirsty, I need a drink.
BRIDGET
But we don’t need any melons!
ANNIE
Well he did try!
And he bought some eggs.
Yeah, just a few.
NICK [sending email]
‘Yo Dan!
Hector did the shopping today.’
Nice melons.
‘He bought one hundred and forty four eggs.’
ANNIE
Just a few.
NICK
‘And ten melons instead of ten lemons.’
What an idiot.
Ha!
HECTOR
I would like some eggs please.
I would like some lemons please.
And oh, dog food for my head!
Ha, ha, ha, thank you!
ANNIE [sending email]
‘I went shopping for Hector today and bought him something really cool!
I cannot wait for him to try it on.’
ANNIE
TRY IT ON.
BRIDGET [sending email]
‘I went to the clothes shop and bought Hector a really trendy outfit!
He will look just like David Beckham!’
BRIDGET
I’ve got something for you!
ANNIE
So how did Hector do the shopping?
Ah-ha!
Hector ordered ten melons instead of ten lemons.
Oh, an easy mistake, he did try.
BRIDGET
Yes, he did try.
NICK
And what about the eggs?
ANNIE
OK, eggs.
You buy a dozen eggs, yeah.
NICK
Yep, a dozen is ten.
BRIDGET
A dozen is twelve, stupid!
NICK
I know!
ANNIE
Well Hector has put the number twelve here.
NICK
Well that’s OK, that’s one box.
ANNIE
No, he ordered twelve boxes.
BRIDGET
One hundred and forty four.
ANNIE
Now, dog food.
NICK
Ha, ha, I can’t wait!
HECTOR
OK, I’m ready!
NICK
We’re ready!
BRIDGET
Enter!
HECTOR
Do you like it?
Well?
ANNIE
Ah [erm] I like the shirt.
BRIDGET
I like the sarong.
NICK
I like the shoes.
HECTOR
So, am I co-ol?
NICK, BRIDGET & ANNIE
[Erm].
HECTOR
No.
I’m not cool.
NICK, BRIDGET & ANNIE
[Erm] no.
HECTOR
So, I will go shopping.
NICK
Here we go again.
Hector! You can’t go out there on your own.
You went shopping on the Internet.
HECTOR
Yes.
NICK
Ha-ha!
You ordered melons instead of lemons and too many eggs.
Have you ever been to a supermarket?
HECTOR
No.
My …
NICK
Who are these?
HECTOR
My …
NICK
… Servants.
HECTOR
Yeah, my servants..
NICK
Servants.
Now I understand.
BRIDGET
Come on Hector, I will teach you how to shop, Hector …
ANNIE
‘Till you drop.
Bridget and I will be the shopkeepers.
BRIDGET
And you are our customer!
HECTOR
OK. [Clears throat]
Good afternoon.
BRIDGET
Good afternoon!
ANNIE
Can I help you sir?
HECTOR
Eh?
BRIDGET
What would you like to buy?
HECTOR
Oh, I would like some …
ANNIE
… Clothes!
HECTOR
Yes, I would like some clothes, please.